Broken

I want to be broken.
Oh how I love that I can say that! I can say it with out being gripped by the fear that God wouldn't break me the way I wanted to be broken. I truly want my heart to be shattered in a million pieces, so that God can remake me into who He wants me to be. How can I appreciate anything good until then?
I want to lay broken at His feet, so that He is all I will ever want. He becomes the very air that I breath, my everything.
It's weird because I realized that I have never really experienced pain. I have never had my heart shattered. I've never really gone through a major trial, a major anything. Therefore, how can I grow? The best growth comes out of trials, right? Well, I want the know God and I mean, really know Him. And whatever has to happen for that to happen I want to happen. I'm sick of thinking about myself. I'm sick of not appreciating what I have. I'm sick of caring what everyone thinks of me. I'm sick of being a lover of the world.
I want to be broken, broken at His feet. Never looking back, picking up my cross and following Him. My lover, my very breath. My God. He's all I ever needed. :)